Ilo Tempore
by AdmiralMoll
Summary: Yet another twist on Mission of Gold. What if Amanda had died?


Disclaimer: Scarecrow and Mrs. King doesn't belong to me. Parts of this story use dialogue and scenes from the episode "Mission of Gold" by Lynne Kelsey and rights to said scenes belong to their respective copyright holders. No infringement was intended.

**New Author's Note:** I wrote this story some years ago and decided to update the format for it. I had previously used the old standard of paragraphs and single spacing. Since being written, that format has changed to the block formatting. The only other part of the fic that I have changed is to correct the priest/justice mistake I made. Other than that, nothing is different. Oh, and I also wrote this when I was about 18 so if it is on the sentimental side, well, I was 18. :-)

Author: AdmiralMoll

Title: Ilo Tempore

Rated: G

Synopsis: A twist on Mission of Gold

* * *

"Code Blue, Room 346C. Code Blue, Room 346C," the voice on the intercom squawked as Lee stepped out of the elevator on Amanda's floor. He walked around the corner to see nurses and doctors rushing to Amanda's room, Dotty West close behind.

"Lee, it's Amanda," she said, her voice tight with worry. They shared a desperate look, and together, they hurried after the doctors.

"Where's that Bicarb?" Dr. Neely asked as he and several orderlies rushed around Amanda's bed.

"Right here, Doctor," one of the nurses replied.

"We need one-hundred milligrams of Lidocane, stat," one of them said.

"You'd better wait out here," Lee said to Dotty, hoping to spare her the trauma. He could hear the life-support flat lining. The noise was ringing in his ears, and his heart caught in his throat.

"No, no," was all Dotty said and Lee couldn't blame her for wanting to stay. Together they entered the room.

"Better charge the paddles," Dr. Neely said. He saw Lee and Dotty in the room and walked over to where they stood in the doorway and said, "Mr. Stetson, you can't help us save her life, but if you get in the way, you will help us lose it."

Lee looked at him, nodded, and he and Dotty got out of the man's way. A man who could stare down a Russian terrorist was completely lost when it came to hospitals. He hated hospitals; bad things happened to the people in them. He and Dotty left the room to Dr. Neely's voice saying, "All right, clear."

They went to the sitting room nearby to wait. Lee was exhausted—physically and emotionally, and he could see that Amanda's mother was not in much better shape.

They sat down on one of the couches in silence, Lee remembering Dotty's words earlier. "She's going to be fine," Dotty had said when she first saw her daughter under the oxygen tent, "she's going to be absolutely fine. Lee, I have never seen her give up on anything that was important. And she's...she's not going to give up now."

Right now Lee could only hope that Dotty's instinct was right. He closed his eyes, trying to will himself back forty-eight hours. Two days ago, he had married Amanda King. It was the happiest day of his life. If he had known that their honeymoon was going to be interrupted by a bullet through Amanda's chest, he never would have come to California with her. How could this happen to them? This was supposed to be the greatest time for them, their first time together as husband and wife, and God knew they deserved some happiness. Some time away from bullets and kidnappers and terrorists. Lee couldn't help but wonder if fate had something against him. Something to deny him happiness.

Dr. Neely walked in, waking him up from the slight doze he had fallen into. Lee shook himself, furious that he had fallen asleep while Amanda battled for her life. Quickly Lee and Dotty stood up, eyes anxious. "I'm sorry," Neely said with true regret. "She kept fighting and fighting, but there was too much damage. There was nothing we could do."

"No," Dotty gasped, face ashen. "No. No," she continued to deny it.

Lee just stared at the doctor, begging him to say that it was a mistake. That Amanda was fine. That she was alive. But the doctor gave no such reassurance. Lee Stetson, a man who had seen countless people die, had killed some of them himself, didn't know how to react to death. The death of the one woman he truly loved. Loved more than life itself. He reached for Dotty and pulled her into his arms. They stood there crying for a long time. It was the first time Lee had allowed himself to cry in public. Amanda was dead. How many times had he almost lost her? Somehow, because they always made it through, he had convinced himself that nothing could happen to them, that they would always come out on top. When he had no more tears, he pulled Dotty over to the couch and looked at her.

"How could this happen to her?" Dotty asked, brokenly.

Lee knew that this was the time to come clean. Dotty had had enough of a shock today, but she needed to know about Amanda's life.

"Mrs. West. Dotty," Lee began. "I don't know how to tell you this. I shouldn't but you need to know the truth. Amanda would want you to know the truth."

"The truth about what, Lee?" Dotty wiped her eyes.

"The truth about our lives. The secrets that we have hated keeping from you." Lee looked at his mother-in-law, the woman he had hoped would be as much a real mother to him as she was to Amanda. He continued slowly, "The secret that Amanda and I don't really work for a film company. We work for the government."

"Yes for I.F.F." Dotty said confused. She thought that IFF was the government. "I knew that International Federal Films was a part of the government."

"Yes, technically that is true, we work for IFF. But IFF isn't a film company. It is the cover for a government intelligence agency. Amanda and I are intelligence operatives."

Dotty's eyes widened as she absorbed the significance of that statement. "You mean you are a spy?"

"Amanda and I are...were...are spies. But we don't use that word. Usually we work counterintelligence—keeping the foreign spies from stealing our national secrets. Rarely do we do the spying of other countries."

"I..I can't believe it," Dotty shook her head. "My daughter was a spy?"

"She was one of the best."

"How...when..." Dotty tried to absorb this revelation. There had been too many shocks this day.

"She got into it by accident. I met her at a train station over four years ago. She saw I was in trouble and did a favor for me. She worked for us as a civilian, running odd jobs, helping with small cases—solving the bigger ones, until this year, when she became a full agent."

"Has anything like... this happened before?" Dotty asked. _How many times has she been hurt that I never knew about_? Dotty wondered.

"You mean, has she ever been...shot?" Lee asked, the pain obvious in his voice. "No, usually I'm the one that gets shot." He could see that that startled her, but he continued knowing that it was time to come clean—fully clean. Dotty's eyes begged for the whole truth. "She has been... kidnapped, and shot at, and questioned by terrorists, but she always..." Lee stopped, remembering this was the one time that always didn't hold true. "She was amazing." Lee shook his head as the tears began to fall again.

"Were you on...business...this time," Dotty asked, tears in her eyes at learning that her daughter had suffered and she hadn't been there to help.

"No..." Lee knew that he had to come clean about the other part of her daughter's secret life. "I shouldn't be the one to tell you this--not like this. But you really deserve to know. Amanda...Amanda should be the one telling you. She hated keeping these secrets from you and the boys. But we were trying to protect you. We weren't here on business. We were here on our honeymoon."

Dotty's eyes got even wider. "What?"

"We eloped two days ago. We kept it a secret to try to protect you and the boys. We knew that there were people out there who would use you and Phillip and Jamie to get to me...to us."

"Oh, my God," was all Dotty could say. First, she had lost her daughter, then she had learned that she knew nothing about the woman her child had become. "Welcome to the family, Lee," she said, beginning to cry again.

Lee wrapped his arms around the woman who was his mother-in-law and began to cry with her.

* * *

The TV droned on the evening news in the King household, but no one paid any attention to it. "And so, while Washington D.C. is usually a hotbed of international intrigues, this one has political experts stumped. Foreign dignitaries have been arriving at Dulles International Airport all day but with no official schedule. There is no summit meeting, and when questioned about the reason for their arrival, all dignitaries without fail cite 'personal business.'" The anchorman turned to another camera saying, "We will update you on this mystery as soon as more details become available." The two anchorpeople began to chatter away about the mysteries of foreign relations and the wonderful weather forecast for the upcoming weekend.

Oblivious to the television, a woman sat on the couch, her tear streaked face a silent testimony to the daughter she had just lost. Somehow it seemed to her that the world just couldn't go on when her daughter had died.

* * *

The day of the funeral—Amanda's funeral—was glorious. The sun was shinning—the day belonged more to June than the end of February. Lee cursed the weather. How could the sun still shine when he had lost the only person he loved more than life itself? How, he asked himself, could you allow yourself to care? Whenever he opened up and cared about someone, he only got hurt. He remembered asking Amanda in Germany, "Whoever said life was fair?" or something like that. He remembered her answer, "No one, but I keep expecting it" so well. No one told him his life was going to be fair, but he never expected it to be this unfair. With a sigh he got up from bed and began to dress for the funeral of the woman he loved. The funeral of his partner in more than just work. It seemed that he had been to too many of these terrible occasions.

* * *

Dotty had decided to have the ceremony at the cemetery rather than at a church but as she sat on her bed the morning of the funeral, she couldn't make herself move. She didn't want to go downstairs even though she knew Joe, Carrie, and the boys were waiting for her. She stared out the window and watched the clouds dance across the winter sky. She didn't want to leave the house. She didn't want to bury her only daughter. A daughter she only now realized she didn't really know. Dotty sniffed and dabbed at her eyes with a delicately crocheted handkerchief, thinking that it didn't seem real. She kept expecting the front door to open and Amanda to walk through announcing that she was home, that she had just been out of town for IFF. Or to wake up to the sounds of Amanda rushing through breakfast to get to the office early. _The office, _Dotty snorted to herself. Amanda had never really been going to the office, or to her club, or to walk neighbor's dogs. She had been going out to spy. All the times that Amanda had come home late or not at all, she had been working as a government agent. It was still unbelievable to Dotty. Almost as unbelievable as her…death. It didn't seem real, and Dotty still hoped that she would wake up from this horrible nightmare to find her daughter alive and well and normal. The funeral would mean it was all real. That it wasn't a horrible nightmare, and Dotty didn't want to go.

"Dotty!" Joe called up the stairs, "We have to get going, or we'll be late!" His voice was strained, as he called to his ex-mother-in-law. He and his wife had been living with her and the boys ever since they had heard the news, and it had been a strain for everyone. Amanda's presence was still palpable around the house, from her smell, to the way she vacuumed the floor, to the way the dishes were arranged in the cabinet. Just the other night, they ate a meal she had prepared before she went to California. Joe could still feel his ex-wife's presence every time he stepped into a room and he didn't know how to deal with that. He was still confused about his feelings for Amanda and now he would never get a chance to straighten them out with her.

But his presence had been a great help to Dotty, however. The boys had woken up screaming the past two nights, frightened by the nightmares psychologists said were common to children who had lost a parent. Having Joe there to help comfort them had really helped Dotty.

"I'm coming!" she called back, her voice breaking slightly, and with a sigh, got up from the bed. She had never felt her age as intensely as she had the past week. She was old, but she had outlived her husband and her daughter. She had to get through just one day at a time. There had to be a reason for everything, even the bad things.

* * *

The ride to the cemetery seemed to take no time at all, and before Dotty knew it they were pulling through the gates of Arlington National Cemetery and into a traffic jam of limousines and foreign cars.

"Wow," Joe said as he tried to navigate around them, "they must be burying someone really important." He resolutly kept his mind away from who they were burying that day. Dotty's idea to have the ceremony at the gravesite was a good one. Joe expected Lee Stetson, some of Amanda's friends from work, and maybe a neighbor or two. Having a small crowd at a church would seem like an insult to Amanda's memory. She had always seemed so active and friendly with everyone, but only three bouquets of flowers had arrived at the house. One from Lee, one from IFF and one from a neighbor down the street. It seemed that no one cared that Amanda King had died. Joe was forced to leave his thoughts, as he had to try to weave around many flag bestrewn limos; he expected the traffic to abate as they approached where Amanda was to be buried, but if anything, the congestion got worse. Finally, he gave up and pulled the car off to the side, some distance from Amanda's final resting-place. The family slowly got out, the boys gazing around them at the plethora of bodyguards and men in black suits standing alertly, the women too sad to really notice. Mentally, Joe classified them all, some were government workers, others were foreign government workers. His wife sighed and Joe pulled her into a one-armed hug. Joe felt sorry for his new wife—she had really never gotten to know Amanda. As they made their way around to the gravesite, many of the men took off their hats and the women murmured condolences to the family.

"People are being so nice," Jamie whispered to his brother.

Joe overheard him and said just as quietly, "They are." He wondered what was going on. They topped the hill that separated them from the grave and were shocked to see the rows of chairs in front of Amanda's grave and the many people who already filled them. Even as they watched in amazement, workers at the cemetery were setting up more chairs, adding to the rows already created and starting new ones. There had to be nearly two hundred people there already.

"What are all these people here for?" Jamie asked eyes wide.

"I think," Joe said slowly, "they are here for your mother."

They walked down to the hive of activity and were immediately shown to the front row with great respect. Joe, who was used to some formal occasions, was staring as much as the boys were as he recognized faces he had only seen of TV. How do these people know Amanda? he thought inanely as he took his seat. All of them looked sad, as though they had lost their best friend. It was all Joe could do to keep from demanding an explanation from each and every one of the as to why they were here, but he sat still as the chairs filled.

Finally, the justice stepped up onto the dais that had been erected in front of Amanda's grave. Her coffin rested on it, covered with flowers and an American flag. Dotty knew that Amanda's work with the Agency allowed her to be buried at Arlington, but she didn't know why all these people were here and why there was such a ceremony.

"Friends and relatives," the justice began, "we are here to commemorate the memory of Amanda King—an amazing woman whose great life was cut short by tragedy. And so let us pray..."

The justice continued on for some time, using the biographical information that Joe had provided, until he came to the end. "It was a bit unusual," he said, "but several of Amanda King's friends have asked to be allowed to speak." He looked at Dotty and Joe for permission; Joe only a fraction of a second behind Dotty in nodding his approval. The justice acknowledged them and beckoned a dark haired woman sitting among middle-eastern men in turbans and saris. She slowly got up and made her way up the few steps of the dais, followed closely by her husband and several of the turbaned men. The woman stepped up to the microphone.

"Hello," she said, her musical voice tinged with sadness. "I am Princess Penelope and this is my husband, Prince Reza." She paused, gathering up her courage. "I met Amanda King four years ago when my husband and I were here on a diplomatic mission. Amanda...Amanda was wonderful. I don't think there is another word for it. She gave me a tour of the school system, invited me to see her sons in a neighborhood play. She looked past the titles and the bodyguards and accepted me for myself. She was the most sincere person I have ever met. She helped me through a difficult time—offering advice and just listening as I talked through my problems. I...I remember, we had a misunderstanding, and I took off on my horse. Amanda was allergic to horses and terrified of them as well, but she...she couldn't let me go off without sorting it out. She got on the biggest, scariest horse in the entire barn to come after me. What made this act all the more heroic was the fact that she also had a broken foot. Her own problems didn't matter to her when a friend needed her. I truly considered Amanda King a friend and I owe much of my happiness to her. The world is a lesser place without her." With that, Penelope took a flower and placed it delicately on Amanda's coffin. Then she and her entourage bowed deeply and left the stage.

They had barely stepped down when a man quickly took their place. Dotty and Joe gaped as they recognized the Vice-President. The man cleared his throat and said, "I never met Amanda King, but I am here officially to convey the condolences of the administration, the government as a whole, and the President personally to the family of Amanda King." He looked directly at the family and continued, "You have our deepest sympathy, and if there is anything you need, we hope that you will let us know." With a sad smile he turned around and placed a medal on the coffin, saying quietly, "With the thanks of a grateful nation." He then silently stepped down. The King family just stared after him in wide-eyed astonishment. The President had acknowledged Amanda with a medal? The President? The King family could not believe it.

King Edmund Spencer got up on the stage, his face a solemn mask where usually a smile reposed. Even his grin lines seemed somber. He cleared his throat and said, "I am King Edmund Spencer. Often I have been called a party king or a psuedo-monarch but I still rule a country. A country that owes so much to Amanda King. Not only do I owe the safety of my country to Mrs. King, I owe her the safety of my family as well. We met under rather odd circumstances, we had a very strange misunderstanding. She thought I was trying to kidnap my son. It took a bit of talking but once we straightened out the mistake, she did all she could to see that my family and I were together. We owe much of our current happiness to Mrs. King." He smiled sadly at the crowd. "We all owe so much to Amanda King."

Conrad Barnhill nervously followed King Edmund Spencer. He cleared his throat and began to speak. "I met Amanda in high school, and even then, it was obvious how special she was. I was much the same person as the one you see here before you today. I was shy...and not very coordinated. Amanda was one of the school cheerleaders as well as one of the most popular girls in the class. But she never looked down on me; she never treated me badly as some of the other students did. That was what set Amanda apart from the rest. If she knew you were a good person, she would do anything for you. Once she had made up her mind about your character, nothing could change it. I loved Amanda King, and although she didn't return my feelings, I still knew she cared. She was a friend, and now I've lost her." Conrad looked sadly at the coffin and left the dais.

Lord Bromfield got up from his seat, followed by his wife. "I met Amanda King in London completely by accident. We were both watching a cultural dance when she bumped into me. I was so glad she did. My wife and I had the privilege of meeting a wonderful woman. She is to be credited with saving my marriage. I'm afraid that meeting me was not as pleasant for her, as there was a rather large brouhaha surrounding us, but my wife and I wanted to consider her an old family friend. The thing with Amanda was after talking to her for ten minutes, she was like an old family friend. You knew her and trusted her. That was her greatest strength. My wife and I will miss her, and treasure our memories of her forever." Lord Bromfield kissed the coffin and placed a flower on it. The he and his wife moved away.

As Lord Bromfield sat down, a short dark man took his place. Bela Pravik nervously cleared his throat. "I met Mrs. King at football stadium. She was very nice. She helped me with my English and when I was in trouble. She...very nice. She was my friend. It is hard being foreigner in America, but Mrs. King was so nice. She make me feel at home. She make me feel American." Bela kissed the coffin and sat down.

Next to speak were Harry V. Thornton who told how Amanda helped him when he was in trouble. He told about how he could trust her above all other people, how easily she could make people care for her. Princess Velosky was next and spoke about Amanda's generousness and her simple grace. She told of how she had met Amanda at her estate sale and how Amanda brought her meatloaf because she thought that she had needed cheering up. She told the gathered what a rare person Amanda was and that she would always treasure the memory of her friend from Arlington, Virginia. After Princess Velosky sat down, a mother from the PTA took her place. She spoke about how Amanda was always the first to volunteer for a fundraiser, how she was always willing to help. Next up was a young man, nervous around so much royalty and influence, but determined to speak. He told about how Mrs. King had coached him, how she had always helped all the Bombers team members, even when they were losing. He looked sadly at Phillip and Jamie before retaking his seat next to several other boys in baseball uniforms.

The next person to stand up was very familiar to Lee. T. Percival Aquinas made his way up to the stage, a decidedly different person than usual. His suit wasn't slightly rumpled, it was pressed into straight lines, and his usually cheerful face wore an unhappy expression. He took off his glasses and polished them before beginning. "I am an historian. I deal with books and facts, not people. I see life as a series of events that make up an era. People are just players in a cosmic game. But Amanda King was different. I see people, because observing them is my job, who just go through the motions of life, not really living it. Amanda lived. She took joy in each and every moment and looked forward to the next for what it would bring. Even I could see this. So often we get caught up in the tragedy of an occurrence that we don't look at the big picture. The big picture here is that Amanda King affected each and every one of you in a positive way. We can't let the misfortune of her death cloud the joy of her life." T.P. looked at Lee as he said this. "Amanda wouldn't want it. She would want us to rejoice in the changes she wrought and live for her memory. History always remembers the good people; that is our job." With that T.P. left the stage. The crowd began to whisper among themselves about what he had said.

Emily Farnsworth stood up and immediately all murmuring of the crowd stopped. She slowly made her way up the steps to the dais. She gazed around solemnly at the crowd. Lee hadn't seen her look that serious since she had been pretending to be a Soviet general. "All of you came here to honor the memory of Amanda King," she began in her aristocratic British accent, her eyes sweeping the large crowd. "But while Amanda's memory deserves honor, it also deserves celebration. All these people have come here to tell her family how much knowing her meant to them, and they are right. All of us who met Amanda King have walked away with something more. We have all been blessed. If there was ever a true angel living on earth, Amanda King was it." Emily took a deep breath before continuing. "I met Amanda King while visiting America. She graciously showed me around and though at first I thought she was just a nice, ordinary, person, her true nature soon showed through. Amanda was the cleverest, bravest, smartest, and most honorable person. When we met on other occasions, my first impression was only reinforced. When presented with the unexpected, Amanda would take a moment to absorb it, then react accordingly. She was so curious about everything; it was part of her charm. Amanda could be surprised once, but she would never be caught the same way twice. She would learn and grow every day. Amanda...your memory will always be treasured by those who met you. We will celebrate you life every day. Your life will continue in us." Emily gave a stately nod to the gathered people and stepped off the stage.

Billy got up and stood in front of the microphone. He could see Dr. Smythe frowning at him anonymously hidden in the crowd. Billy could see that he disapproved of his agents speaking in public. Billy didn't care. He owed Amanda King a tribute. "Like many of you, I only met Amanda King a few years ago, but right away, I saw she was special. I believe the words I used were honest and idealistic. Amanda could brighten anyone's day. She would bring in a cake or just a smile and soon our entire office would be smiling. She was the most thoughtful woman. She always professed a love for my wife's fruitcakes at Christmas, even though I heard her tell a friend that she personally didn't like the stuff. It was that consciousness of the feelings of others that set Amanda apart. She would never do anything to hurt anyone, unless it was absolutely necessary. Amanda was a rock that you could always depend on. If she said she would do something, she would do it to the best of her ability—give one hundred and ten percent. There was nothing she couldn't do if she put her mind to it." Billy turned and looked sadly at the coffin, saying, "Amanda, you were one of the best people I have ever known." With that he shook his head and sat down. It hurt to lose such a promising agent and a friend as well.

Francine watched Billy step down and decided that she too had to say something. She had to make everyone understand how she really felt about Amanda King. She had always told herself that she would wait for the right time to say anything. Somehow this was the right time. She got up and took her boss's place at the stage. "Unlike most of you here," she began in a strident tone," I did not like Amanda when I first met her." She paused to let the crowd absorb that fact before going on, "I didn't like her at all. I suppose I thought she was too good to be true." She paused again and said quietly, "And I was jealous of her. Amanda had everything—a beautiful home, children she loved, a mother who cared. She had looks, character, and everyone was willing to trust her in an instant. In addition to that, she just appeared at work one day. She literally stumbled into a career I had worked my entire life for. I had clawed my way into my position, over men and people who said I wasn't good enough, and she just fell into it. She got lucky one day, in her nightgown no less, and I resented that. I really resented it. What really galled was that she was better than I was. All my life I had worked, and this mother from the suburbs just happens by and suddenly, I wasn't the best anymore." She stopped. "It really hurt," she said quietly. "But what really hurts is that I never got to tell her why I acted the way I did. I was always so snotty to her, acting as though I couldn't be bothered, acting as though I was better. I wasn't better, but I didn't want to admit it. Not even to myself. So I let my jealousy and petty attitude get in the way of knowing what I now know was a wonderful woman. I regret that the most; I was never able to tell her that I didn't hate her, and she died thinking I did. But I did know that Amanda could be trusted. She was just like a little puppy; you couldn't not like her. She always seemed to have a ton of people around her, waiting to get her attention, and wherever she went, people would look for her. She was the one person you could trust not to look at like you as though you were stupid when you had a question. She...she had this spark of life around her. And now it's gone." Francine looked up, tears glistening in her eyes and said, "But we won't forget her. I don't think anyone could." She sat down embarrassed to finally have admitted what she had been too scared to say before.

After hearing all the people speak about his ex-wife, Joe knew he had to speak. He got up from his seat, not even noticing Lee who was about to rise, but quickly sat down when he saw Joe get up. Joe looked out over the crowd of people he didn't know, but who obviously had met and loved Amanda. He was unsure how to react to the fact that she knew all these distinguished people, to the fact that she had a secret life. He knew she worked for the agency, but he never knew how much she really did. He cleared his throat and started to speak about the woman he knew. "I met Amanda King when we were both in college. I...was stunned by her the first time I saw her. We started dating and married soon after graduation. Amanda was the generous person every one has said she was—perhaps she was too generous. She put her life on hold so I could become a lawyer and to raise our two boys. I was selfish. I put my career ahead of her and our family. I never really got to know who she was. I never let her discover who she was." Joe paused, shaken by what he had just admitted to the crowd and to himself. "Amanda was so forgiving, but even she knew a lost cause when she saw it. When we met again a few years ago, she had grown. She was a different person. A better person. Amanda could do anything. She raised our two sons into wonderful young men, held down a demanding job, and still had time to make such an impression on everyone here." Joe shook his head, not knowing what else to say. "Thank you everyone for coming," he said sadly as he retook his seat with the family.

The justice stood up, thinking that everyone had spoken, but stopped when he saw Lee stand slowly up from the middle of the crowd. He knew Lee; he had married him the week before. He sat back down as Lee took the stage. His eyes were puffy and red from prolonged crying but there was a certain dignity about him. He looked out over the crowd, at all the people who had known and loved his wife. He knew he had to tell his story. "I met Amanda Stetson four years ago, and unlike most of you, I didn't realize what a terrific person she was." Lee was speaking from his heart, as he had never done before. He was so caught up in what he was saying, he didn't even notice the slip he had made. Amanda Stetson, not Amanda King. Joe's eyes widened when he heard Lee's slip, but Lee didn't even notice his reaction nor the reaction of their friends in the audience. He continued with his story. "I had to be hit over the head every day for nearly three years before I realized what a wonderful person she is...was. Amanda...Amanda defies words. She was..." Lee stopped; he couldn't continue that line of thought. He still wasn't ready to deal with her death. He decided to concentrate on her life as many of her friends had done. He began again, "I am the person I am today because of Amanda Stetson. In fact, I am probably alive because of her. She saved my life in more ways than I can count. Before I met Amanda, I was the definition of loner. I wouldn't trust anyone; I wouldn't let anyone get near me. I depended only on myself and looked at the rest of the world with suspicion. Then I met Amanda. I treated her like I treated everyone else, right from the start. I pushed her away as hard as I could, but she was so stubborn. She saw into the heart I wouldn't show anyone and was determined to bring it out. She...she was the most stubborn person in the world. If she knew that something was wrong, she would nag you and nag you until you told her what the problem was just to get her to stop." Lee paused. "Then she would help you solve it. You couldn't argue with her—mainly because she was usually right.

"Amanda gave everyone her all, but she did ask for a lot in return. She wanted honesty, fairness and trust. And she would look at you with her gorgeous eyes until she had them. She was so full of life...of love." Lee turned to Phillip and Jamie and told them, "Don't ever think for a second that your mother's life had no meaning. All these people here are testimony to her greatness." Lee looked back at the crowd, tears in his eyes. "Everyone here loved Amanda, and there was no one more deserving of love than her. I..."

* * *

"Lee," Dotty said, gently pushing his shoulder. The poor man had looked so lost and exhausted, and she wanted to let him sleep, but something told her he would never forgive her for not waking him up. "Lee! Dr. Neely is coming."

Lee shook himself out of the half sleep he had fallen into and stood up. He and Dotty hurried over to the doctor.

Neely looked at them seriously and Lee had a horrible flash of deja vu. His dream. It had been so real. What if it had been a premonition? He dreaded hearing what the doctor had to say.

"Almost lost her," the doctor relieved Lee's anxiousness by saying, "but she didn't give up—not for a second. She's holding on so we're back where we started, with a long way to go." Lee put his arm around Dotty as they listened to the doctor. "That woman's a fighter—that's good." He nodded and turned away.

"Thank you," Lee said to the retreating doctor, knowing thanks for Amanda's life would never be enough. Nothing he could say could ever be enough. Amanda was alive and the world came alive as well.

* * *


End file.
